Thursday, May 12, 2005


Now that the news has reached everyone regarding our soon to be expanding household, everyone wants to know whether we want a girl or boy. As long as it's healthy, we don't care.

A boy would be nice, or a girl.

My family wants a boy because mine is the last generation of Perry men. If I don't produce an heir, the Grand Perry lineage will come to an end, forcing us to deed the family estate and holdings to the peasants. I'll probably be forced to shoot the horses to spare them the indignity of being ridden by commoners.

I'd like a boy because of the whole, "Let's play catch," factor of course. Sometimes I have little daydreams where I'm watching my boy play baseball on a warm spring day, sipping a soda and eating some popcorn, yelling out, "Atta boy!," and "What the fuck are you doing! Keep your eye on the ball! Jesus Christ!"

Good times.

I think that Bobbi wants a girl. I like the idea of two girls only two years apart. Sisters, growing up together, becoming best friends, looking after each other, covering for each other when one wants to sneak out and meet her boyfriend at the park, some greasy guy with a tricked out Eclipse and two earrings who I will fucking tear apart with my bare hands if you so much as breath near my baby girl! Jesus Christ!

Boy or girl, it's all good.


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