Thursday, June 02, 2005

F.Y.I.

Babies who eat Fruit Loops produce green shit.

It's never a good idea to say, "My wife is getting bigger by the day," within earshot of said wife. Even if she is getting bigger by the day because she is pregnant.

If you are going to go to McDonald's and get breakfast, tell your husband before he has eaten or face the wrath of a man who could've had a bacon, egg and cheese biscuit instead of a bowl of green-shit-producing Fruit Loops.

If you add water to the pool, it will rain for the next three days.

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