Monday, August 08, 2005

"You shut your mouth when I ask you a question..."

Bobbi likes to point out that I tend to say the most inappropriate things to people. I'll admit that I have little fear of asking a direct question but sometimes I make a legitimate mistake, like the one I made two years ago.

We had just moved into our new house and were out to dinner with our new neighbors. Nelson and Maritza are the best neighbors a person could hope for and we've often said that when we move we're taking them with us. They have a little boy named Noah and, at the time, Noah was about 3-years old. He used to stammer when he talked, like kids will do when they are just learning (or so I thought).

We were sitting at dinner, having a great time, when Maritza mentioned something about her son and I said, "You mean N-N-N-Noah?"
"Are you making fun of my stuttering child?" She asked.
"He stutters?!"
"Yes, he stutters."
"I just thought he talks that way because he's so young!"
"No, he has a stutter, I take him to a specialist every week."
"Oh my God..." said Bobbi, embarrassed to be married to me.
"I didn't know!! I just thought it was cute!!" I pleaded.
"Nope, it's a stutter," Maritza said, and went back to her dinner.

Other times, I'm willing to defend my remarks, like I did the last time we went out with Nelson and Maritza and, once again, I said the wrong thing to Maritza. We were finishing our meal when Maritza set down her silverware on her empty plate and said, "Wow, I can't believe I ate everything!"
"I can," I said.
"Booray! Exclaimed Bobbi, "That's a horrible thing to say!"

Later, after we got home, Bobbi lectured me on how I should never say anything about a woman's weight, even if I'm joking, even if she's thin. I defended myself by explaining that the only reason I said it at all was because I don't associate Maritza with weight. There are people that I would never make a weight crack around but Maritza isn't one of them because I just don't see weight when I see her ( mainly because she's not really fat!). Also, and this is the real point I think..... She asked for it! If you're sensitive about your weight, you don't call attention to the fact that you're the first person to finish a huge meal! C'mon!!

I don't know, maybe I'm just totally out of tune with women when it comes to the whole fat issue. Bobbi gets very upset when I point out that she's gotten much bigger in the last few months, and she's pregnant.


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