Sunday, April 08, 2007

Hippety-Hoppity


Well, another Easter has come and gone and with it any hope of maintaining a diet. Not that I'm actually trying to maintain a diet because tomorrow I have my first appointment with Bobbi's personal trainer. Consequently, I'm trying to pack on as much weight as possible. The way I see it, if I'm going to pay the guy, he's going to work for it.

In our house, Easter lasts much longer than just one day. It started last Wednesday when my parents came over and brought the girls some baskets. Then Lisa sent home some baskets for the girls on Thursday. On Friday we received presents and candy in the mail from Bobbi's mom and grandmother. Then on Saturday we went to the Easter egg hunt.... but first my sister stopped by with baskets. Finally on Sunday, the Easter Bunny showed up with, you guessed it, baskets (and eggs hidden in the front yard). Easter is pretty much a weeklong event in the Perry household. Sort of like an "Easter Hanukkah" where the presents are spread out over seven days of celebration. In fact, I'm sure that if the Jews celebrated Easter it would be very much like what we have here in our house. Of course they don't, because they killed Our Lord Jesus Christ and will face the wrath of eternal damnation and roast in the fiery pits of hell. Which sucks for them because those malted milk balls that look like tiny easter eggs are awesome!

Along with the Easter baskets that Lisa sent home she also sent home some books. She told Bobbi that she had read these books to her girls when they were growing up and she hoped Sam and Mac would enjoy them as much as they had. It's nice when someone can be so thoughtful and pass on something that has brought them joy from their family to yours. The first story that we read contained a teddy bear who was missing a leg and an eye, which led to one of his friends remarking, "I'll bet he would make a good pirate." What no one seemed to think to ask was, "Who was the sadistic bastard that ripped off his leg and gouged out his eye? Somewhere out there is a crazed teddy bear mutilator seeking his next victim and all you can think about is a good Halloween costume!?" There was also a bear in the book who lived on the moon and was very sad because he was lonely and no one came to visit him ("Look honey, this is what your life will be like if you don't make the drill team!"). The second story that we read was called "The Birthday Surprise" and it was about a teddy bear who woke up on his birthday only to discover that none of his friends had gotten him any presents. Surprise! My daughters only three years old and Lisa's got me reading her Old Yeller and The Diary of Anne Frank.

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